How do you say No Thanks???

[Jeterbug1337]

I am well over 6 months into the matching process for my first GS journey and I've talked with several wonderful IMs & IPs but for one reason or another things did not work out.

Now, I've been talking with an IF pretty near to me & he feels we are a match. he seems very nice & I have no doubts he will be a great dad... but my BF & my mom have concerns about me working with him. I do not feel comfortable moving forward without their support & their concerns are valid.

So... how do you tell PIPs that you don't feel you are a good match? If it were a mutual decision I would be fine with it, but I feel terrible telling someone that thinks we are a match that I don't agree. All PIPs have been through so much already & I don't want to discourage him or hurt his feelings in any way :(

TIA

[nicolette]

but we cant help everyone hun,i know its hard and we hear so many heartbreaking stories along the way.you have to put this guy right though,be upfront and tell him you are unable to work with him,its just not ideal for you
love nicXX

[tottypops]

well jodie,sometimes its not easy to tell some one "thanks but no thanks",ive had to say no to potential surros in the past for several reasons,and ive had to do it again as recently as today....
its not easy but im sure you will do whats right for you.
i wish you lots of luck

[Kris]

this is the hardest part hun,you just have to do it and keep in mind its whats right for you and your family.LOTS of hugs,I know how hard it is

[WoundedWing]

Honesty is the best policy and it is so hard to tell someone "No thanks", I would tell him due to the lack of family support you feel you are not the right match. You can go to say that you feel he will make a great Dad and wish him luck. Sooner you do it, the better.

[skyofstars236]

You just have to be honest, Jodie. Try to let him down gently but the sooner the better. You have to have oodles of support into this crazy world called surrogacy so you have to do what's right for you and your family!

Big hugs!

[Jeterbug1337]

Thank you so much you guys!! I know I've just got to get it done & save us both a lot of wasted time... I'm just not any good at disappointing people. :(


I'll let you all know how it goes tomorrow. thanks again! ~hugs~

[Jeterbug1337]

Mkay Ladies~

I explained everything to the IF & he took it all very well!! :) He thanked me for being honest & upfront with him now & wished me the best! :D


Thank you all so much for your kind words, advice and support. Ya'll Rock :D

[WoundedWing]

Happy that it went well.

[SouthOrlandoSurrogate]

I would tell him due to the lack of family support you feel you are not the right match. You can go to say that you feel he will make a great Dad and wish him luck. Sooner you do it, the better.




I agree 100%

[SinCitySurro]

I think it gets a little easier to phrase things in just the right way after the first "we don't match" speech. I'm glad it all worked out for you. When I was looking for IP's I would try and find something that we didn't agree on and just say I wish you all the best, but I don't feel this is a good match. No one ever freaked on me, thank goodness! :p